still pissed... grrrrr
Current mood: bitchy
Category: Life
Okay so I'm going back into my old habit, this was always my favorite place to vent anyway. I removed the ex and his gf from myspace so I am now free to say and do WHATEVER the hell I want on my myspace. Without repercussions- unless of course there is a rat infiltrated on my myspace…
Anyway- for those of you that don't know wrestling is coming into town and that is Gavin's favorite thing in the entire world. So Mark's brother asks if he and Mark can take the kids because it's on Mother's Day (and according to the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines I get the kids on my own holiday- in fact I’m supposed to get them for the whole weekend ) and he says -and by the ways I already bought the tickets (if you bought the tickets then WHY are you asking??).
So that kind of made me mad because I didn’t even get a fat chance to have my say. But that is typical G style. Here was my dilemma as far as that went. Gavin knows they’re in town and he also knows that he *could* go (I’ll just get it in the open that if I were to say “no” that it would “accidentally” slip out; I trust them about as far as I could throw them). SO I debated for days what to do because I really wanted to do something special- maybe even take them myself, I don’t mind wrestling!
Mothers Day is MY day. Gavin is old enough to know what the holiday is about and I’m trying to teach him (and Gwyneth) responsibility and to appreciate things, ect. Going out with your DAD and doing DAD stuff kind of takes away the MOM aspect of MOTHERS DAY.
IMO, that’s kind of selfish of him to even ask! But I’m forced into saying “yes” because I know the drama that’ll follow if I don’t conform. He’ll use the kids against me and they’ll just be mad at me on Mother’s Day because of the woulda coulda syndrome…
…. And FYI I always had the kids make cards for their dad on Father’s Day. Because I want them to appreciate what certain days are about and that you can do special things for people you love (that and I understand how important it is to have a relationship with your father).
Now- to why I’m newly mad.
So recently Mark starts in on me- just an attitude. I'm trying to do this communication thing in regards to the kids that divorced parents should do once in a while to get messages across. Well he takes it all the wrong way. So we get into a little fight. He tells me I’m not a perfect parent (and thankfully reminds himself he isn’t either) and I should get over myself and except it… EXCUSE ME???.
So I kindly remind him about that upcoming weekend and how if he wants to fight we can fight. I remind him that by law I get to have the kids on that weekend and if he wants to treat me badly then I can exercise that right.
So he tells me to think about the kids.
Then he says I can be the one to tell them WHY they can’t go.
Then he says I am being self centered and I need to stop thinking about what I want for once and to think about them for a change. (This is a good place for one of those wtf’s)
I told him to take his own advice and every decision I make is for them so they can grow into well adjusted RESPONSIBLE happy adults. I love my children more than anything if he doesn’t know that he’s on something.
So I guess maybe I was being a bitch to him, but he deserves it. I’m still mad about the wrestling thing and I would love to say he can’t take them, but I can’t be the bad guy (to the kids). I know that is all Gavin thinks about and wants to do and I know because of the hype Gwyn wants to go.
I wonder if there are any tickets left??
Comments:
Wow. Oddly enough I feel your emotions on this subject...Why do they try to bring it back on us when they know that they are the ones that have over stepped? We may never know...Good luck with that...I myself may go get tickets and tell him its my weekend and I want to spend it with my family...but thats not nice...I know but sometimes you just wanna do that sorta thing... I get it...
Posted by Shannon on Tuesday, April 28, 2009 - 7:05 PM
Well....I think that you should buy tickets and tell the kids you are taking them. Why let him ruin your weekend? So you get to kill two birds with one stone. He didn't ask first so it is not your fault that he wasted money on extra tickets. Take them yourself. Don't give into that "I will be the bad guy thing" Your kids are getting old enough to explain to them that their dad should have asked and you would love to let them go but you already have something planned. Sounds like their dad needs to step up and be more of an adult and there are always ways to stop him and make him think. Even if it does take some longer than others, he will eventually get it. :) Oh, one more thing. He is a piece of crap for even hinting that you do not put your kids first, he wouldn't know the first thing about that.
Posted by Dusty on Tuesday, April 28, 2009 - 7:26 PM
Honey first of all, if anyone knows anything about you, your kids and the sperm donor, they know YOU are not the selfish one. That stupid bastard pisses me off. You are an extremely giving and loving person, fuck that stupid bastard. He's a lucky son of a bitch to've ever had the chance to get a second glance from you, let alone make babies with you.Whatever you decide to do, whoever gets pissed in the process, just keep in mind people don't stay mad forever. Unless they're stupid selfish bastards, which I know you and your children are not. It'll all work itself out. Don't get too stressed about it. Life is too short. I know you'll do the right thing.Personally though, I'd get my own tickets and bring the kids. Fuck that stupid piece of shit.Ok, I'm done now.:)
Posted by Julie on Tuesday, April 28, 2009 - 9:35 PM
Men! and dido to what Julie said. That's all I have to say....lol
Posted by Missy on Wednesday, April 29, 2009 - 9:34 PM
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Spaghetti is running out. Sunday, February 01, 2009
Spaghetti is running out.
Current mood: adventurous
Category: Blogging
I finally found a blog site that I like that doesn't want to charge me or have a bunch of ads on it. I've wanted one for months now... I've been playing with it for a few days... so go check it out and let me know what you think. Here is the link..
I have removed the link. If you are interested, please contact me. My space is being a jerk and disabled it. poo.
Current mood: adventurous
Category: Blogging
I finally found a blog site that I like that doesn't want to charge me or have a bunch of ads on it. I've wanted one for months now... I've been playing with it for a few days... so go check it out and let me know what you think. Here is the link..
I have removed the link. If you are interested, please contact me. My space is being a jerk and disabled it. poo.
not the best man, the better man Friday, January 09, 2009
not the best man, the better man
Current mood: blissful
Category: Romance and Relationships
I just wanted to mention that I have the best husband ever. I'm feeling sappy and I want to share with everyone. I am the luckiest girl to have Kirby for my husband.
The first time Jessica came to my house she was hungry so he made her food to eat- I think it was scramby eggs & toast & stuff. What man would ever do something considerate like that? Or girl for that matter? Not me! I would have just rummaged in the pantry for some chips or snack thing for her.
When we were dating almost daily he sent me text messages telling me how beautiful, sweet, sexy, I was (I archived many of them). Or just that he was thinking of me and that he missed me. I still get them, maybe not all the time, but a lot. I do get my daily lunch I love you texts! I can't get through my day with out those!
Often times we hide notes to each other. I get so excited when he'll pack my lunch to find a letter (yeah sometimes he packs my lunch). Last time I hid one in his wallet. Not a lunch- a note. I really think he's much sweeter to me than I am to him.
At night he lets me put my cold feet on him to warm up. In the mornings he gets my phone alarm that is ringing on the dresser so I don't have to face the cold quite yet. Either that or he's too tired to realize what he's doing…
Sometimes if I'm leaving in a hurry he'll scrape my car for me.
I always get whispers of "I love you" "you're beautiful" "you're cute" and sweet nothings. Especially when I'm not feeling well, look terrible, and am having bad days! He likes to snuggle, steal hugs, kiss my neck, give me mini massages.
I hardly ever have to cook. He split's the cleaning chores- but I don't think I've ever made him scrub the toilets or the tub. I'll do the women's work. He does the litter box more than he should (I forget it's in there). A few weeks ago he sewed a button on my ratty sweater and then fixed a hole for me. He was so good I can't even tell where my hole was!
He does manly things that impress me. For example, he likes tools and I get so bored looking at them at Lowes- it was cute how many times he asked me if I had a level... He builds stuff like tables, shelves, cat litter box house cages. He does stuff with wood working with his dad.. He's got an awesome relationship with his dad.
Kirby minutes are like 10 regular minutes. It's cute. He says the other day, but it could have been 2 months ago.
Kirby is an amazing father. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. He loves his little boy so much. He gets so excited on our weekends that we get all the kids together and we can be our little blended family. I guess with the 5 of us we aren't so little… but I love to see him with Josh (and sometimes Cruz). You can tell by watching those two together what a good father he is.
He has built a strong relationship with Gwyneth. She adores him and thinks the world of him. She likes to have him tuck her in at night after I do. She has opened up and has told us that he is the best s. dad ever (that s. stands for step).
I think things are pretty good with Gavin and him, too. Of course Gavin is older so it's harder to gauge because Gavin is not as outspoken as Gwyneth, but Kirby is constantly finding ways to build his relationship with him as a good step father.
I'm sure I could go on and on, but I think everyone reading this is probably all nauseated by how sickening my lovesickness is. I can't help it. I know I have a good man. I love him so much.
Life lesson: Relationships are mutual. You both have needs, give without expecting a return, but don't let the other person take advantage of you.
Comments:
: () that's my jaw dropped... lol. we could all use such a wonderful person in our lives... congratulations...! Many years of happiness to the both of you!
Posted by Kris on Thursday, January 08, 2009 - 11:36 PM
U made me cry!!! Thanks for making the prego lady cry! AWW, u r lucky to have such an awesome hubby! U two are so adorable together! I am so happy 4 u Aryan!
Posted by Missy on Tuesday, January 13, 2009 - 7:49 PM
Current mood: blissful
Category: Romance and Relationships
I just wanted to mention that I have the best husband ever. I'm feeling sappy and I want to share with everyone. I am the luckiest girl to have Kirby for my husband.
The first time Jessica came to my house she was hungry so he made her food to eat- I think it was scramby eggs & toast & stuff. What man would ever do something considerate like that? Or girl for that matter? Not me! I would have just rummaged in the pantry for some chips or snack thing for her.
When we were dating almost daily he sent me text messages telling me how beautiful, sweet, sexy, I was (I archived many of them). Or just that he was thinking of me and that he missed me. I still get them, maybe not all the time, but a lot. I do get my daily lunch I love you texts! I can't get through my day with out those!
Often times we hide notes to each other. I get so excited when he'll pack my lunch to find a letter (yeah sometimes he packs my lunch). Last time I hid one in his wallet. Not a lunch- a note. I really think he's much sweeter to me than I am to him.
At night he lets me put my cold feet on him to warm up. In the mornings he gets my phone alarm that is ringing on the dresser so I don't have to face the cold quite yet. Either that or he's too tired to realize what he's doing…
Sometimes if I'm leaving in a hurry he'll scrape my car for me.
I always get whispers of "I love you" "you're beautiful" "you're cute" and sweet nothings. Especially when I'm not feeling well, look terrible, and am having bad days! He likes to snuggle, steal hugs, kiss my neck, give me mini massages.
I hardly ever have to cook. He split's the cleaning chores- but I don't think I've ever made him scrub the toilets or the tub. I'll do the women's work. He does the litter box more than he should (I forget it's in there). A few weeks ago he sewed a button on my ratty sweater and then fixed a hole for me. He was so good I can't even tell where my hole was!
He does manly things that impress me. For example, he likes tools and I get so bored looking at them at Lowes- it was cute how many times he asked me if I had a level... He builds stuff like tables, shelves, cat litter box house cages. He does stuff with wood working with his dad.. He's got an awesome relationship with his dad.
Kirby minutes are like 10 regular minutes. It's cute. He says the other day, but it could have been 2 months ago.
Kirby is an amazing father. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. He loves his little boy so much. He gets so excited on our weekends that we get all the kids together and we can be our little blended family. I guess with the 5 of us we aren't so little… but I love to see him with Josh (and sometimes Cruz). You can tell by watching those two together what a good father he is.
He has built a strong relationship with Gwyneth. She adores him and thinks the world of him. She likes to have him tuck her in at night after I do. She has opened up and has told us that he is the best s. dad ever (that s. stands for step).
I think things are pretty good with Gavin and him, too. Of course Gavin is older so it's harder to gauge because Gavin is not as outspoken as Gwyneth, but Kirby is constantly finding ways to build his relationship with him as a good step father.
I'm sure I could go on and on, but I think everyone reading this is probably all nauseated by how sickening my lovesickness is. I can't help it. I know I have a good man. I love him so much.
Life lesson: Relationships are mutual. You both have needs, give without expecting a return, but don't let the other person take advantage of you.
Comments:
: () that's my jaw dropped... lol. we could all use such a wonderful person in our lives... congratulations...! Many years of happiness to the both of you!
Posted by Kris on Thursday, January 08, 2009 - 11:36 PM
U made me cry!!! Thanks for making the prego lady cry! AWW, u r lucky to have such an awesome hubby! U two are so adorable together! I am so happy 4 u Aryan!
Posted by Missy on Tuesday, January 13, 2009 - 7:49 PM
enrichment center Thursday, December 18, 2008
enrichment center
Current mood: full
Category: Life
Normally I'm not one for the posting 2 blogs in one day (but I'm really cold and lappie on my lap is warm- plus Kirby's trying to get more achievements, Gavin's eating hot chocolate I made, & Gwyn is playing a game where you do the Brat's hair). That is my excuse & I'm sticking to it. Anyhow I don't like the 2 blogs in one day thing so I dated this one for tomorrow. Not that it matters because I know that I am lying and now that I admitted the truth you all know that I'm lying, too.
I wanted to let you know that I was really cold at work and I didn't have my lid screwed on my mug all the way and I spilled coffee on my sweater and it was warm. I smelled like coffee, too. It's my favorite ratty sweater. I love it. I'd marry it if I wasn't already married.
My old cat kept running like crazy and slamming himself into the presents under the tree- then going into the dining room and other places. I thought he was nuts (no catnip I swear). He apparently found a red skittle he was attacking that Josh dropped. I think it's lost in the presents. There were claw marks on some of the packages and we had to make some "patches" to cover them up. Yes, they are other Christmas paper patches.
Life lesson: the weighted companion cube in fact can not speak. In the event it does speak, the enrichment center urges you to disregard it's advice.
Comments:
Red skittles have the same effect on me. :)
Posted by Julie on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 8:50 PM
thanks for the laugh... i needed it.
Posted by Mystica on Friday, December 19, 2008 - 2:41 PM
You know, I'm really lucky to be able to spend my time with someone as wonderful as you are. Even when I'm being a gamer and ignoring you because of the xbox, buried in some obscure Dungeons and Dragons material, or just sorting my thousands of miniatures by faction, I know that you love me.I'm very thankful.
I love you.If you were my weighted companion cube, I could never euthanize you.
P.S. The cake is a lie.
Posted by Enginer230 on Monday, December 22, 2008 - 11:40 PM
Current mood: full
Category: Life
Normally I'm not one for the posting 2 blogs in one day (but I'm really cold and lappie on my lap is warm- plus Kirby's trying to get more achievements, Gavin's eating hot chocolate I made, & Gwyn is playing a game where you do the Brat's hair). That is my excuse & I'm sticking to it. Anyhow I don't like the 2 blogs in one day thing so I dated this one for tomorrow. Not that it matters because I know that I am lying and now that I admitted the truth you all know that I'm lying, too.
I wanted to let you know that I was really cold at work and I didn't have my lid screwed on my mug all the way and I spilled coffee on my sweater and it was warm. I smelled like coffee, too. It's my favorite ratty sweater. I love it. I'd marry it if I wasn't already married.
My old cat kept running like crazy and slamming himself into the presents under the tree- then going into the dining room and other places. I thought he was nuts (no catnip I swear). He apparently found a red skittle he was attacking that Josh dropped. I think it's lost in the presents. There were claw marks on some of the packages and we had to make some "patches" to cover them up. Yes, they are other Christmas paper patches.
Life lesson: the weighted companion cube in fact can not speak. In the event it does speak, the enrichment center urges you to disregard it's advice.
Comments:
Red skittles have the same effect on me. :)
Posted by Julie on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 8:50 PM
thanks for the laugh... i needed it.
Posted by Mystica on Friday, December 19, 2008 - 2:41 PM
You know, I'm really lucky to be able to spend my time with someone as wonderful as you are. Even when I'm being a gamer and ignoring you because of the xbox, buried in some obscure Dungeons and Dragons material, or just sorting my thousands of miniatures by faction, I know that you love me.I'm very thankful.
I love you.If you were my weighted companion cube, I could never euthanize you.
P.S. The cake is a lie.
Posted by Enginer230 on Monday, December 22, 2008 - 11:40 PM
That’s not what I wanted Thursday, December 18, 2008
That’s not what I wanted
Current mood: cold
Category: Blogging
Do you go searching for answers and you never seem to get the answers your looking for? I guess I was fishing for someone with the same thoughts as me. (I know- impossible) It's like you had to be there to get it.
Okay- okay...
Well except for you Julie you always seem to be on the same page as me- even when you don't know what I'm talking about (like right now you probably dont, but I know you're with me). No one ever knows what I'm talking about. Or maybe they do, but they're not reading inbetween the lines enough to get what I'm saying.
Especially men.
Maybe I'm not clear enough. I'd draw pictures, but there's a reason I'm not an artist. I'd sing, but I get bood off of rock band enough who knows what would happen in real life!! Maybe I could tell it in jokes, but I think I'm the only one that would get the punch line- well me and 5 year olds. I just don't get it.
I don't really think I'm that far out there. I've had "weird" people tell me I'm too mainstream to be weird and "normal" people tell me I'm to weird to be normal. So I don't fit into any category, therefore no one seems go get me. Except Julie. She rocks.
Or maybe she just wants to kick everyone's asses who wants to be jerks. Which I think is a good idea. I'm sick of "lets talky talky" Except we all know I'm a weanie and I'd have to stand behind Julie and hold up her TAPOUT sign and stuff...
Lesson learned: I'd still have to get someone to help me make the tapout sign- you know- the "artist" thing. Would be a shame if I made Julie make her own sign.
Comments:
Honey, if you need I can make my own TAPOUT sign you know I would. :) Thatd be awesome. Only if you hold it for me though.
Posted by Julie on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 7:39 PM
Well I DO make awesome stick people.
Posted by Kiara on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 7:48 PM
Current mood: cold
Category: Blogging
Do you go searching for answers and you never seem to get the answers your looking for? I guess I was fishing for someone with the same thoughts as me. (I know- impossible) It's like you had to be there to get it.
Okay- okay...
Well except for you Julie you always seem to be on the same page as me- even when you don't know what I'm talking about (like right now you probably dont, but I know you're with me). No one ever knows what I'm talking about. Or maybe they do, but they're not reading inbetween the lines enough to get what I'm saying.
Especially men.
Maybe I'm not clear enough. I'd draw pictures, but there's a reason I'm not an artist. I'd sing, but I get bood off of rock band enough who knows what would happen in real life!! Maybe I could tell it in jokes, but I think I'm the only one that would get the punch line- well me and 5 year olds. I just don't get it.
I don't really think I'm that far out there. I've had "weird" people tell me I'm too mainstream to be weird and "normal" people tell me I'm to weird to be normal. So I don't fit into any category, therefore no one seems go get me. Except Julie. She rocks.
Or maybe she just wants to kick everyone's asses who wants to be jerks. Which I think is a good idea. I'm sick of "lets talky talky" Except we all know I'm a weanie and I'd have to stand behind Julie and hold up her TAPOUT sign and stuff...
Lesson learned: I'd still have to get someone to help me make the tapout sign- you know- the "artist" thing. Would be a shame if I made Julie make her own sign.
Comments:
Honey, if you need I can make my own TAPOUT sign you know I would. :) Thatd be awesome. Only if you hold it for me though.
Posted by Julie on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 7:39 PM
Well I DO make awesome stick people.
Posted by Kiara on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 7:48 PM
Put a face to that e-mail Thursday, December 11, 2008
Sorry if my blogs are complaining a lot lately. I'm in a complaining mood I guess… I have a lot on my mind. Here's an interesting story.
I get e-mails at work from important people all the time. I know names, titles, and other variant positions of authority. So I have a general idea of who is who in my company… But I often don't have a visual of what these people look like.
I know I've seen them all in passing. In the hall, or with a big important looking group of people. I have NEVER been introduced to any of these people- E V E R. I have never overheard a conversation where someone happened upon their name - I think you catch my drift. If it wasn't for the suites they'd look like another regular worker bee.
So Anyway- this guy sits with me (and everyone in my group) and we have to chat about some of our accounts and stuff. When he leaves he instructs me to shoot him an e-mail after I follow up with them to see what the dilly-o is with these accounts that aren't buying.
I'm thinking crap- he didn't introduce himself to me. I have NO CLUE who he was- except that he's some important guy. My super has been so testy lately- snapping at me for every little tiny minute thing…
Dare I ask who he is? I just know that she's going to get mad…If I don't ask and guess who to send the e-mail to and send it to the wrong person what kind of consequences can that ensue? So…
I ask.
The response I get from her and those around me is as follows:
"What? You don't know who that is? I should punch you in the face!"
"Punch me in the face?"
I also get responses such as: I have been there for 2 years I should know who certain people are. It isn't important to the world, but it is important to my job to know certain people. There is something wrong with me because I don't remember that kind of stuff. And I SHOULD know who that is. I don't pay attention to my surroundings. I'm not observant to what is going on around me. I don't ever know what's going on. My poor memory comes up over and over and over and over and over and over… I need to do better. Blah, blah, blah, blah…. Basically it was an all out attack on me. Or I felt like it was an attack.
I wanted to cry.
I wanted to walk out.
I did neither. My phone rang so I answered it.
I sent her an e-mail (I really wanted to just give her a piece of my mind and trash her and scream… but I never do what I want to do when I'm angry):
I'm sorry.
That I just don't have that good of a memory with faces/ names and things. I don't think you noticed, but when he was giving me my accounts I was rattling off information about them before I even pulled the account numbers up… but I DO remember stuff.
My mind just doesn't work like yours. I don't retain information the same way as you do and you shouldn't expect me to be able to memorize things the same way you do. You may be able to know someone who walks by you 4 times in a year- but I won't. I can tell you other things- that you probably don't know… but that is what makes us different.
I have never been a name/face person. I probably never will. I'm sorry that I stress you out so much because of it. If there is a suggestion that will help BOTH of us with this issue…?? I will be more than happy to do it. I just learn differently than you do. I'm not you and there isn't anything I can do about it
______________________________
I tell her what would she rather me do? Not ask her who this was and to send an e-mail to the wrong person? Or should I suck it up and ask and make sure I am sending my correspondences to the correct people? I say maybe I shouldn't ask anymore who is who and just take a guess and go from there, because this was so not worth it.
She says that isn't the point. I am not up to speed.
Turns out that big wig guy- was the owners son. You know- I wouldn't even know who the owner of that company was if it weren't for his "meetings" where you can hear him screaming down the hall on the other end of the building.
Later- after the fact- I get an e-mail that says:
We can talk about this if you want to – and we can do it behind closed doors.
I should not speak so that people around can hear.
I feel like you are being picked on – and that was absolutely not my intention.
How can I help you? There are people and things that are probably important that you and everyone for that matter should know.
I want to get you up to speed but I do not know how to do that when you don't pay attention to things around you.
I am not here to make you feel like shit – but things need to change.
Help me help you!!!!
It is not her intention to make me feel like shit??? OH really??
Todays life lesson: I'm still there taking the crap. I obviously didn't learn anything. I wish I
had a way out. :(
Comments:
My suggestion would be to make a meeting with her to talk behind closed doors. Then tell her if you can fail to notice who is who in the company then there is an obvious problem with the dynamics of the company.. and it goes much further up than just you and her. If there are people there that an employee of 2 years doesn't have a clue about then I am sure there are others in the same boat. Maybe they should offer an easy solution... a memo for all new employees with names and pictures of all the "important"people, or even better, all employees. Help her, help you??... Introductions are a wonderful thing!
Posted by Jen on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 5:25 PM
I agree with Jen's post!
Posted by Missy on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 10:10 PM
*sigh* if only it were that easy.
Posted by Kiara on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 10:11 PM
Drop kick the bitch!! I can get you a poopy diaper to fling at her if you wish. :) I haven't teepeed anyone for awhile. I'm game if you are. :D We can help the dumb cunt help herself.Please excuse the francais. :)
Posted by Julie on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 1:16 PM
Aryan, just talk to her behind closed doors. Explain your situation. If that gets you know where, talk to her boss. Jobs can suck big time, but if you want to fix the situation, start at the bottom of the totem poll and work up it until you have the answer you need. Hierarchy systems are their for a reason. If the person at the bottom can't fix the situation, then her boss needs to help. And if her boss can't, then the next boss. You are a smart woman and will have this solved. Just be polite when you talk to her. Hugs
Posted by Amanda on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 1:19 PM
I get e-mails at work from important people all the time. I know names, titles, and other variant positions of authority. So I have a general idea of who is who in my company… But I often don't have a visual of what these people look like.
I know I've seen them all in passing. In the hall, or with a big important looking group of people. I have NEVER been introduced to any of these people- E V E R. I have never overheard a conversation where someone happened upon their name - I think you catch my drift. If it wasn't for the suites they'd look like another regular worker bee.
So Anyway- this guy sits with me (and everyone in my group) and we have to chat about some of our accounts and stuff. When he leaves he instructs me to shoot him an e-mail after I follow up with them to see what the dilly-o is with these accounts that aren't buying.
I'm thinking crap- he didn't introduce himself to me. I have NO CLUE who he was- except that he's some important guy. My super has been so testy lately- snapping at me for every little tiny minute thing…
Dare I ask who he is? I just know that she's going to get mad…If I don't ask and guess who to send the e-mail to and send it to the wrong person what kind of consequences can that ensue? So…
I ask.
The response I get from her and those around me is as follows:
"What? You don't know who that is? I should punch you in the face!"
"Punch me in the face?"
I also get responses such as: I have been there for 2 years I should know who certain people are. It isn't important to the world, but it is important to my job to know certain people. There is something wrong with me because I don't remember that kind of stuff. And I SHOULD know who that is. I don't pay attention to my surroundings. I'm not observant to what is going on around me. I don't ever know what's going on. My poor memory comes up over and over and over and over and over and over… I need to do better. Blah, blah, blah, blah…. Basically it was an all out attack on me. Or I felt like it was an attack.
I wanted to cry.
I wanted to walk out.
I did neither. My phone rang so I answered it.
I sent her an e-mail (I really wanted to just give her a piece of my mind and trash her and scream… but I never do what I want to do when I'm angry):
I'm sorry.
That I just don't have that good of a memory with faces/ names and things. I don't think you noticed, but when he was giving me my accounts I was rattling off information about them before I even pulled the account numbers up… but I DO remember stuff.
My mind just doesn't work like yours. I don't retain information the same way as you do and you shouldn't expect me to be able to memorize things the same way you do. You may be able to know someone who walks by you 4 times in a year- but I won't. I can tell you other things- that you probably don't know… but that is what makes us different.
I have never been a name/face person. I probably never will. I'm sorry that I stress you out so much because of it. If there is a suggestion that will help BOTH of us with this issue…?? I will be more than happy to do it. I just learn differently than you do. I'm not you and there isn't anything I can do about it
______________________________
I tell her what would she rather me do? Not ask her who this was and to send an e-mail to the wrong person? Or should I suck it up and ask and make sure I am sending my correspondences to the correct people? I say maybe I shouldn't ask anymore who is who and just take a guess and go from there, because this was so not worth it.
She says that isn't the point. I am not up to speed.
Turns out that big wig guy- was the owners son. You know- I wouldn't even know who the owner of that company was if it weren't for his "meetings" where you can hear him screaming down the hall on the other end of the building.
Later- after the fact- I get an e-mail that says:
We can talk about this if you want to – and we can do it behind closed doors.
I should not speak so that people around can hear.
I feel like you are being picked on – and that was absolutely not my intention.
How can I help you? There are people and things that are probably important that you and everyone for that matter should know.
I want to get you up to speed but I do not know how to do that when you don't pay attention to things around you.
I am not here to make you feel like shit – but things need to change.
Help me help you!!!!
It is not her intention to make me feel like shit??? OH really??
Todays life lesson: I'm still there taking the crap. I obviously didn't learn anything. I wish I
had a way out. :(
Comments:
My suggestion would be to make a meeting with her to talk behind closed doors. Then tell her if you can fail to notice who is who in the company then there is an obvious problem with the dynamics of the company.. and it goes much further up than just you and her. If there are people there that an employee of 2 years doesn't have a clue about then I am sure there are others in the same boat. Maybe they should offer an easy solution... a memo for all new employees with names and pictures of all the "important"people, or even better, all employees. Help her, help you??... Introductions are a wonderful thing!
Posted by Jen on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 5:25 PM
I agree with Jen's post!
Posted by Missy on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 10:10 PM
*sigh* if only it were that easy.
Posted by Kiara on Thursday, December 11, 2008 - 10:11 PM
Drop kick the bitch!! I can get you a poopy diaper to fling at her if you wish. :) I haven't teepeed anyone for awhile. I'm game if you are. :D We can help the dumb cunt help herself.Please excuse the francais. :)
Posted by Julie on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 1:16 PM
Aryan, just talk to her behind closed doors. Explain your situation. If that gets you know where, talk to her boss. Jobs can suck big time, but if you want to fix the situation, start at the bottom of the totem poll and work up it until you have the answer you need. Hierarchy systems are their for a reason. If the person at the bottom can't fix the situation, then her boss needs to help. And if her boss can't, then the next boss. You are a smart woman and will have this solved. Just be polite when you talk to her. Hugs
Posted by Amanda on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 - 1:19 PM
Charities, Giving to the Needy? Bah Humbug Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Charities, Giving to the Needy? Bah Humbug
Current mood: triumphant
Category: Religion and Philosophy
Charities are like religions and I don't appreciate people shoving their charities in my face. I’m not going to drop a buck because everyone expects me to. I don’t bring in my children’s school crap and expect people to buy all this stuff off of me from work because I’m selling and promoting it. It is your hard earned money and I respect that.
It is MY hard earned money I can choose where I am going to put it IF I want to put it some place I think is worthy of putting it. I should hope that others can respect that for me as well.
I’m tired of people acting all high and mighty and better than me because I’m not all blah blah blah about what I’m doing for the poor and needy. Newsflash- I don’t really go out of my way during the holidays for the poor and needy. For one thing there are needy people ALL year round, not just during the holidays. So lets start by getting off our high horses and make a monthly contribution before you degrade me in front of a bunch of people again. Another thing- it isn’t your business where I put my money.
If you want to have a nice conversation with me and not lynch me for what I think is a good cause- then I would love to have a chat.
There are thousands of thousands of charities for someone to choose from and there are millions of reasons why someone would or wouldn’t choose one charity over another. I have my preferences over why I like the ones I do and I know everyone has their reasons why they like the ones they do.
Another point that was rudely brought up in my face was would I want to do a Christmas exchange at work? Sure- that would be fun. Oh but it was a trick question to catch me off guard to see how superficial I am. Because the answer to this was (and this is my "supervisor" with this horrid behavior, btw) WHY in the hell would I want to go buy stuff for people who DON'T NEED it when there are so many people out there suffering??.
*side note- who is she to say how needy our co workers are and that they don't need a gift to brighten their days??
Why would I want to buy people gifts that don’t need them? Well because I WANT to buy people gifts because I love and CARE for them and that is what I WANT to do for them. I have the spirit of GIVING. You don’t have to be needy to receive a gift! I like to buy for people I love, too.
I don’t always have extra money for my friends and if I do then I’m happy to buy them something special I think they would like because I can. So stop making me feel bad. Stop acting like a bitch. Stop being a (I can't think of another mean word) during this wonderful time of year and let me do what I want to do and let me have the holiday spirit.
She should be glad I can't think of 2 mean words. But while I'm still pissed and going off...
You’re not better than me just because you think you’re giving more to the poor than I am! You sit in your corner typing away gossipy notes and being nasty to me for what?? What purpose do you have at making ME feel bad?
What makes you better than me? Because you make sure that everyone knows your good deeds?
Anyway the point I'm making is I know there are a lot of bad things in the world going on and I understand there are a lot of needs, especially in this economy... I have been there myself and I have done that. I know how it's like to not have food on the table, to worry if you're going to have to buy presents for the children, and to wonder where you're going to find money to keep the lights on. I'm not insensitive... but I know I can't save the world!
I shouldn't have to live my life in misery because I know other's are (it does make me sad, but I can't withdraw and dwell on it- what good does that do?). I should be allowed to have happy holidays, too. I should be allowed to give to co-workers, friends, and families if I want without someone breathing down my back about what have I done for everyone else. I think I do my part. And if I don't Karma will bite me in the back (it always does).
Life lesson: You don't have to brag about what you give, in fact, it's your choice if you give at all. And you don't have to take crap from the "do gooders" of the world... I think sometimes it's those that are really making a mess of things...
Comments:
You go lady! You are a good person, don't listen to whatever that mean evil snob is saying! We love you~
Posted by Amanda on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 1:45 PM
You are exactly right! If you do things because you can't wait to brag about it, your are doing it for the wrong reasons. I love it when people send money to someone else and all that is with the money is a sweet little card, no name of who it was from. All that matters is that you gave a gift and that is between you and yourself, not you and everyone else. And you are right, those are the people making the messes, because people "feel" like they do good deeds doesnt mean they really do good deeds...they only do it to make themselves feel better...
Posted by Missy on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 3:42 PM
If you donate to charities but live your life as a royal itchy- crotch fat ass stupid cunt bitch, do they kind of cancel each other out? Ugh.The world is full of worthless sacks of crap. It's an awesome thing people like us are out there.
Posted by Julie on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 10:31 PM
Current mood: triumphant
Category: Religion and Philosophy
Charities are like religions and I don't appreciate people shoving their charities in my face. I’m not going to drop a buck because everyone expects me to. I don’t bring in my children’s school crap and expect people to buy all this stuff off of me from work because I’m selling and promoting it. It is your hard earned money and I respect that.
It is MY hard earned money I can choose where I am going to put it IF I want to put it some place I think is worthy of putting it. I should hope that others can respect that for me as well.
I’m tired of people acting all high and mighty and better than me because I’m not all blah blah blah about what I’m doing for the poor and needy. Newsflash- I don’t really go out of my way during the holidays for the poor and needy. For one thing there are needy people ALL year round, not just during the holidays. So lets start by getting off our high horses and make a monthly contribution before you degrade me in front of a bunch of people again. Another thing- it isn’t your business where I put my money.
If you want to have a nice conversation with me and not lynch me for what I think is a good cause- then I would love to have a chat.
There are thousands of thousands of charities for someone to choose from and there are millions of reasons why someone would or wouldn’t choose one charity over another. I have my preferences over why I like the ones I do and I know everyone has their reasons why they like the ones they do.
Another point that was rudely brought up in my face was would I want to do a Christmas exchange at work? Sure- that would be fun. Oh but it was a trick question to catch me off guard to see how superficial I am. Because the answer to this was (and this is my "supervisor" with this horrid behavior, btw) WHY in the hell would I want to go buy stuff for people who DON'T NEED it when there are so many people out there suffering??.
*side note- who is she to say how needy our co workers are and that they don't need a gift to brighten their days??
Why would I want to buy people gifts that don’t need them? Well because I WANT to buy people gifts because I love and CARE for them and that is what I WANT to do for them. I have the spirit of GIVING. You don’t have to be needy to receive a gift! I like to buy for people I love, too.
I don’t always have extra money for my friends and if I do then I’m happy to buy them something special I think they would like because I can. So stop making me feel bad. Stop acting like a bitch. Stop being a (I can't think of another mean word) during this wonderful time of year and let me do what I want to do and let me have the holiday spirit.
She should be glad I can't think of 2 mean words. But while I'm still pissed and going off...
You’re not better than me just because you think you’re giving more to the poor than I am! You sit in your corner typing away gossipy notes and being nasty to me for what?? What purpose do you have at making ME feel bad?
What makes you better than me? Because you make sure that everyone knows your good deeds?
Anyway the point I'm making is I know there are a lot of bad things in the world going on and I understand there are a lot of needs, especially in this economy... I have been there myself and I have done that. I know how it's like to not have food on the table, to worry if you're going to have to buy presents for the children, and to wonder where you're going to find money to keep the lights on. I'm not insensitive... but I know I can't save the world!
I shouldn't have to live my life in misery because I know other's are (it does make me sad, but I can't withdraw and dwell on it- what good does that do?). I should be allowed to have happy holidays, too. I should be allowed to give to co-workers, friends, and families if I want without someone breathing down my back about what have I done for everyone else. I think I do my part. And if I don't Karma will bite me in the back (it always does).
Life lesson: You don't have to brag about what you give, in fact, it's your choice if you give at all. And you don't have to take crap from the "do gooders" of the world... I think sometimes it's those that are really making a mess of things...
Comments:
You go lady! You are a good person, don't listen to whatever that mean evil snob is saying! We love you~
Posted by Amanda on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 1:45 PM
You are exactly right! If you do things because you can't wait to brag about it, your are doing it for the wrong reasons. I love it when people send money to someone else and all that is with the money is a sweet little card, no name of who it was from. All that matters is that you gave a gift and that is between you and yourself, not you and everyone else. And you are right, those are the people making the messes, because people "feel" like they do good deeds doesnt mean they really do good deeds...they only do it to make themselves feel better...
Posted by Missy on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 3:42 PM
If you donate to charities but live your life as a royal itchy- crotch fat ass stupid cunt bitch, do they kind of cancel each other out? Ugh.The world is full of worthless sacks of crap. It's an awesome thing people like us are out there.
Posted by Julie on Tuesday, December 09, 2008 - 10:31 PM
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