Current mood: contemplative
Category: Life
Pondering something here on lost, broken, or forgotten friendships.
Why do people invest so much time into each other, relationships, friendships, and love... then give up? What do they get out if it? It's wasted time, and hurt feelings. What benefit is there to make an effort to stop?
Time is so precious. It's not like friendships should be some kind of fling you can trash after years (or even months) of laughter, tears, sorrow, and just getting to know each other...
It's not like there are many people out there that you just 'click' with... where you know it's instant and the bonding is close. But sometimes you need to!
I hate that I have a couple friends here that I don't talk to anymore. Oh I have tried. I've left comments, messages, I've given them my phone number, my cell phone, (even Kirby's). I have offered to do the driving. To visit there or to pick up. I think I'm giving enough, aren't I? Just when I'm ready to throw in the towel and forget it, to say "goodbye" to that friendship, I get a hello.
The effort is too taxing on my part, why do I need to be teased so? I wonder if I should forget the occasional hello that comes at the brink of my decision process (I don't even know if it's sincere) and just let it go.
If you don't want to come over or invite me to visit, then say so!
On another note when it comes to those of love interest- why do you have to be the way you are? Before this past year and a half I had not really given much thought to the long term relationships. I was glad I had beaten all odds and at the the time I was oblivious... Now sometimes my sleep is tainted with nightmares. Iroinically, they are more like a punishment that I didn't do what I should have done.
Of course the outcome would be the same, but I guess I punish myself for not freaking out properly or handlings things better...
Given thoughts of love and poeple together, monogamy- I wonder do people these days really believe in that? Is there one right person that you can spend your entire life with? Or are you bound sooner or later to end the relationship and forced to start over? Tell me, what is the point of starting over if you know eventually it's not going to last?
Why put forth the effort? Waste time getting to know someone intimately? To give them the opportunity to hurt you... To have to deal with "the other" Would it be easier to stay aloof and take the company when you can? Are nights alone really so awful you must find someone?
I was called bitter this week, but I think I prefer the word cynical, or better yet, cautiuos. I like where I am at this point in life, but there are still bumps in the road, you know!
Comments:
I have often wondered the same thing about friends. I guess there are alot of people who don't want close friends.I would love to come visit or have you visit, but once we made the drive, it would be time to turn around and go back home. lolAnd on the topic of monogamy.. I think there are alot of people who believe in the idea but at the same time are unable to commit. I certainly hope that there is that one right person. I can't imagine starting over especially after investing the last 18 years in my current relationship. Nah... I wouldn't say you were bitter either. Cautious, yes.. which shouldn't we all be a little more of?
Posted by Jen on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 8:28 AM
life seems to be made up of compromises...I don't have any friends anymore, sure I have people that I care about, but I don't get to enjoy their company anymore. I compromised once, and thus set forth my current situation. The more we compromise the more we find ourselves to be not what we once were. Be this good or bad, we change, others change, nothing is constant. I think your thinking about these things show a great level of maturity, the answers to these questions are not as important as the asking of them. When my life seems to be going really great, that is when I am the most cautious, even cynical, because I just know happiness never lasts. But, then again, I don't think unhappiness last forever either.Some people believe that there is one special person for each of us. I think some of us have more options than others, based on our personalities. My wife probably has very few options based on her attitude and opinions. I on the other hand could be very content with people from many walks of life. I have happiness with myself. I haven't always had this, but I have grown in this way over the years. So even if I find myself alone, I will be content.Hey, Miss Sin Nickle go to this webby for some sarcastic smiles...http://www.despair.com/viewall.htmlTell me what you think, some are quite relavent to this discussion...
Posted by Ben on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 12:42 PM
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