Irked Friday, November 09, 2007

Irked
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Life
Some days all the answers are clear and some are mucked up by thoughts that don't belong... I feel insane when I hear a stupid sad song (that I don't even like-mind you) and it makes me sad, too. What is the purpose of that? Do the creators of such things WANT people to feel sad? It's especially difficult when I was so cheerful moments ago.

I recently had a proposal and I don't even know what to think of it. As much as I would like to really tell this person how I feel I know it'll do me no good and in the long run I'll be the one paying anyway. I'm always the one that ends up suffering the consequences, especially ones left by others regardless of my actual involvement.

Why do people think they can shirk their responsibilities and use my needs against me?

While I'm ranting here what gives people the right to manipulate and involve other's feelings to get their way? What is the point in having an agenda and making things difficult? Who are they serving, but their own self centered ways? Do they care the other people (children even) are hurting? As long as they get their way everything is fine and dandy. How can they be so callous?

I also don't understand how one person can love someone that has no regard for anyone's feelings, but their own. It really irks me that people put up with crap for the greater good when there is no greater good beyond what was. Why reserve a part of yourself for someone that has openly hurt you and will do it again? Is it true your first love will always have a piece of your heart? Will I always have this hanging over my head?

When my heart was shattered and I began to pick up I must have left those pieces on the floor. Either that or I've hardened it so no one can penetrate that deep again.

Yeah I'm kind of cranky. I have a horrid pain that must be permeating through my body.

Oh and where are my glasses?

Comments:

I can't help but wonder about that paragraph towards the end referring to loving someone for a "greater good". i've always said a relationship is two-fold...with the heart and mind...just sometimes, the heart won't stop clutching at what it holds most dear, no matter how much sense the mind makes.......
Posted by Kris on Saturday, November 17, 2007 - 5:00 PM